


'Neath the Mistilteinn

by Paraprosdokia (ChangeableConsistency)



Category: The Avengers (2012), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Christmas fic, Community: avengerkink, F/M, Jane Pepper and Darcy never make it onscreen, M/M, Oops again, Oops., Or rather prompt fic fail, Prompt Fic, but it's supposed to be beard smut, kissing under the mistletoe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-11
Updated: 2012-12-11
Packaged: 2017-11-20 21:15:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/589708
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChangeableConsistency/pseuds/Paraprosdokia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For this prompt: </p><p>http://avengerkink.livejournal.com/12672.html?thread=29345152t29345152</p><p>Maybe it's just me, but I can't help but think that the presence of Thor and Tony's beards gets glossed over a lot of the time.</p><p>What does it feel like during kissing? What does it feel like during oral sex? What does it feel like during cuddling/nuzzling? Does it scrape uncomfortably or tickle pleasantly? Does their lover like it? Do they stroke it because they like the texture? Do they want Thor/Tony to shave it off?</p>
            </blockquote>





	'Neath the Mistilteinn

**Author's Note:**

> Ever so slowly mapping over my Avenger Kink Meme fills.

Tony looks at the door to the workshop with approval. DUM-E, having not screwed something up for once (it's a Christmas miracle), pulls away, leaving the bough of mistletoe arched perfectly over the entrance. Now, to call Pepper down for... he'll figure something out by the time she picks up.

Just then he sees Thor bounding down the hallway, booming, "Friend Anthony! Have you-"

The Asgardian breaks off as he crosses the threshold and catches sight of the mistletoe, tears springing to his eyes.

Oh, Crap! Wasn't his brother Baldr killed by mistletoe? Tony wasn't too strong on Norse myth, he wasn't sure if he wanted to read up on it and give Thor more room to tease him about not knowing the difference between fairy tales and history. Honestly, he has a better grip on reality than you'd think a thousand year old alien/demi-god who dresses like a reject from The Tudor's would.

Before Tony can apologize, Thor is sweeping him up into his arms and capturing his mouth in a kiss, and okay, not what he was going for, and not his usual thing even before Pep, but the dude's obviously spent at least a couple of those years practicing kissing, because he's _really_ good at it. 

Tony's not exactly a blushing virgin himself though, and after a brief flash of surprise, becomes determined to give as good as he gets. 

He can't remember the last time he kissed another man, much less one with facial hair and he has a spark of amusement wondering if Thor has more experience in this than him. 

Thor's lips are soft and full beneath his, edged in his well trimmed beard, which tickles Tony's lips and face pleasantly. Tony's stretched up on his tip toes, while being held safe and secure in Thor's arms. 

Thor gentle breaks the kiss sooner than Tony's expecting and he sways forward, slightly dazed, and lower lip attractively swollen from Thor's teeth. Thor's lips are shining from where Tony licked them in-between Thor's quick nips, and tears run freely down his face. He grasps Tony's arm in a firm warrior's grip, and says sincerely, "Thank you, Anthony, for honoring my brother. My mother will be pleased that her edict regarding mistilteinn has not been forgotten on Midgard." 

"Um, well, yeah, uh...exactly. Of course. You're... Welcome?" 

Thor glances around the workshop, with a devilish grin, "It is a shame my Lady Jane is not here to honor him as well. She is not in her lab, nor on the roof. Do you know where I might find her?" 

Tony clears his throat, a little stung to have Thor apparently put the kiss out of his mind so quickly. Tony knows from kisses, and that wasn't just a kiss, it was a _**kiss**_. He makes a mental note to have have mistletoe hung all over the tower, not only for his personal benefit, if Thor's going to kiss anyone he meets under the mistletoe, it's only fitting that Tony allow as many of their teammates to share the love. Oh! And now he definitely needs to make sure Fury accepts his invitation to the holiday party Pepper's been planning. 

"I, uh, she and Pepper just got back a bit ago, they're probably either in your suite or ours putting their 'kills' away." 

"Kills?" Thor looks confused, "I do not believe they were going hunting, Anthony. I believe they were visiting a Bergdorf Goodman in order to procure new garments for Lady Pepper's feast? Does he have a hunting ground? It does not seem like something my Lady would enjoy." 

Tony laughs and reaches up to thump Thor on the back, "Shopping is hunting, at least for Pepper. C'mon, we'll ask them to show off their trophies; it's one of Pepper's favorite parts. JARVIS?" 

"Ms. Potts and Dr. Foster are indeed, 'displaying their 'kills'' for Ms. Lewis in Ms. Lewis's quarters. Ms. Lewis has asked I edit together footage for a 'haul video', would you like to be notified when they have finished?" 

"Oh, hell no! I don't need Pepper getting You Tube famous on top of everything else. Thor, buddy, grab a sprig of mistletoe, and follow me." 

The work shop door slams shut behind them as Thor's fading voice asks, "What is this 'haul video'?" 

The mistletoe over the door quivers for a moment before falling to land on DUM-E, and the robot droops in disappointment. 

There's a mechanical sigh as he tries to reattach the bough before Tony returns. 

**Author's Note:**

> Me: Hey, Tony, you up for an epilogue? Everyone's got DUM-E feels-
> 
> Tony interrupts: Can you blame them? He's friggin' adorable. 
> 
> You know... 
> 
> For a hunk of junk.
> 
> Me: Yeah, he was so sad when the mistletoe fell.
> 
> Tony (jokingly affectionate): Yesh. He is kind of worthless; maybe I _should_ donate him to the community college. Heh.
> 
> Me (evilly misunderstanding on purpose): Oh, in that case, instead of writting a super cute epilogue where you show DUM-E some love, I'll have you get super frustrated with him and _actually_ donate him somewhere. 
> 
> Tony (horrified): You WOULDN'T!
> 
> Me: Oh, you're right...
> 
> Tony (wiping away panicked sweat drop): Phew!
> 
> Me (BWAHAH): You would totally have to dismantle him first to strip away any proprietary SI parts. Oh! And cripple his AI. Can't have that stuff getting out to the masses willy nilly.
> 
> Tony (clutching DUM-E protectively): NOOOOOOOOOOO! KEEP YOUR FILTHY HANDS OFF MY ROBOT YOU EVIL HELL-BEAST!
> 
> Me (sighing as I leave): You never let me have any ~~evil~~ fun.
> 
> Tony (still hugging DUM-E tight): It's okay, sweetheart. I won't let the mean-writer-monster hurt you.
> 
> DUM-E (shaking): Beep-Boop?
> 
> Tony (kissing the top of DUM-E's 'head'): That's right kiddo, you and me.
> 
> DUM-E: Boop-wa-Boop?
> 
> Tony (resting his cheek against DUM-E's casing): Forever.


End file.
